KT #774

Did no written jokes, just a bit about doing enough drugs to meet God who told him to clean up and drive to Kill Tony, then started making beat-box noises until Tony cut him off. First-ever appearance and first time ever doing stand-up; 38 years old, a musician from Wisconsin who plays bars, drove 19 hours to be there. Tony called it one of the worst-received sets he has witnessed in ten years. The stage name spelling is a guess from the captions.

Material on cyberbullying, his bullying alcoholic dad and an eye-patch/treasure-map bit that Joe DeRosa praised for its joke construction. Won a joke book, kill Tony debut. 34, born and raised in El Paso, Texas, about ten years in comedy, drove roughly 8.5 hours, half Puerto Rican, half black. Works as a security guard for Sun City Security (restaurants like Chico's Tacos) and previously worked at a sex shop selling dildos.

Set on a homeless man's question, trans jokes and going to an all-black high school. A Comedy Mothership door guy who has been on the show numerous times over the last five years, back with a brand new minute; Tony called him the only non-debut bucket pull of the night. Interview: divorced about a year ago (ex works at a comedy club where he used to run shows), nine months sober off kratom capsules and going through withdrawals, living with his mom 90 minutes outside Austin and driving in daily, doing Uber Eats to afford seeing his daughter, tony offered him a spot on the secret show, social handle given on air as Adam Luckey.

Set was about Buc-ee's and hitting on women there, left with a medium joke book, kill Tony debut, drove five hours from Houston, turning 31 the following week. Works at Punchline Houston. Tony ran with an 'Amish fat guy' bit and coached him to move the mic stand. Interview produced his story of hitting on an engaged woman at Buc-ee's empty-handed, and getting oral sex in a cemetery from a Tinder match, at the cemetery where his great-grandmother is buried.

Kill Tony debut, fifth bucket pull. From El Paso, Texas, four years in comedy, currently on tour (had a Vulcan show later that night), makes sketches for a living, set on being fat and being a bottom, and a new belt from Buc-ee's, bits included failing to zip his Carhartt vest on stage and talk of Terry Black's barbecue, disclosed being molested at nine by a family friend who bought him a pack of twelve Homies figures afterward, which prompted a Homies explainer from band member Michael.

Set was relationship advice about a friend pointing out his girlfriend Britney's 'giraffe neck', interview covered fan gifts including bobcat tails from a street witch and an automatic slingshot, a mock feud with Joe DeRosa refereed by D Madness, and upcoming shows in LA, San Antonio, Houston, Orlando and Miami, plus headlining a festival in Okinawa, Japan, while doing a brand new minute; introduced as formerly the dark storm of Atlanta, now the dark storm of Austin.

Set was tips for getting a hot wife, including the women's shelter 'adopt don't shop' punchline, kill Tony debut from Lafayette, Louisiana; two and a half to three years in comedy. Works offshore in the oil field on 14-days-on/7-days-off hitches, which sparked a long offshore/onshore runner with Joe DeRosa. Married to Cosmo Elizabeth, whose name is tattooed on his arm in Wu-Tang font, admitted to past jail time for DUIs and drug possession, a failed burglary of a teacher's $1,000 pillows, and a pending Lake Charles DUI where he threw his drink around the car when pulled over for not signaling, drove in with Aaron Heltz.

Read her jokes off a large piece of paper, and Tony's main note was to memorize the material. Set was about therapy, Texas and her husband, first set ever. Lives in Austin about three years, married roughly five years to an underemployed musician she met on Facebook; they are in couples therapy. Works as a health and fitness coach. The interview turned into a long run about Redban losing six pounds in two weeks on an all-sandwich diet. Tony was unsure whether the surname is Knight or Knights.

Set was a Nike slogan runner about her divorce and a suicidal friend. Kill Tony debut, one year in comedy, mostly at Cold Town Theater open mics in Austin, from Azerbaijan (captions mangled it as Abjan/Asan). Started comedy after breaking up with a comedian boyfriend. Designs dildos for a living, roughly twenty so far including a large 'black edition', which Tony and Redban ran with at length, joe DeRosa repeatedly praised her. Her social handle was read out as something like Hasanova, so the surname is likely Hasanova but the captions were too garbled to confirm.

Set was a single-premise run about calling thick women after sandwiches (torta, steam bun, banh mi, hoagie, po' boy) ending on 'sliders' for little people. Kill Tony debut. 32, originally from Akron, lived in Cleveland the last five years with Hilarities as his home club, nine years in comedy, moved to Austin about seven months ago, sells mortgage products. Had not kissed anyone since moving to Austin, so the show ran its Kiss Me segment and an audience member named Steph came up. Tony's note was to shorten his setups.

Tony joked he should change his name for show business, and the crowd chanted it. Ran out of joke books on stage so his was handed over in back. Kill Tony debut, two years in comedy, lives in San Diego and was in Austin for the week hitting mics, set leaned on his Hitler-youth look, his barber and moving back in with his grandparents. Said his dad was in prison while he grew up and his mom was 17.

Opened with a unisex bathroom/TJ Maxx misdirection joke, then was asked to do two additional minutes on the spot, covering being with his wife since they were 15 and a trans porn percentages bit, joe DeRosa compared him to an edgier Jeff Foxworthy for delivering dark material in a clean, likable way, final bucket pull of the night and the golden ticket winner, from Baton Rouge, Louisiana, three years in comedy, 30 years old, a firefighter for ten years, drove roughly eight hours with Brock White Lions. Says he has a solid 20 minutes of that caliber.

Closed the show as the regular after Tony explained William Montgomery was sick, Ari Matti had added tour dates and Timmy No Brakes was saving material. Brand new minute of three very short, dark jokes about Hitler, TikTok and Queers for Palestine; Tony called the opener the greatest Hitler joke he has heard in 20 years. Interview covered that his first regular episode was airing that same day, and a story about telling his landlord he was about to be famous after quitting his job. Mike Finoia said he was like a David Lynch movie doing stand-up, tony nicknamed him 'The Real Deal'.